Writing Archives - Anton Hoyer

Antomaton

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 25 Mar 2026 20:00:00 +0000

This project was intended as a code snippet for my landing page but eventually became the entire site. The latter formerly featured a list of my interests, which felt a bit plain to me, given the exposure; that it shamelessly listed several private interests of mine, such as ASMR, parenting, or politics, did not help […]

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Effervescence

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 11 Feb 2026 20:00:00 +0000

Penner’s pretext: We’d’ve preferred the present/perfect tense, plenty letters except “E” et “Y” & plenty “Q” terms except “QWERTY” et “Q’d.” Nevertheless, these sentences were penned w/verve, hence the endless between-references where we erred. Never merely seek the expected, yet be perplexed, test thy self-exerted tenets, then tweet cheesy/lewd excerpts, eh?—Kelly Greendell Remember the week […]

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Abram 2 Zachary

Anton Hoyer — Fri, 01 Aug 2025 20:00:00 +0000

🐋 Aubrey’s body cannot decay extraterrestrially; fucking ground hogs — I’m joking — key locations match not “our perpetrator’s questionable reasoning”; savor the unemployment, Vegas wins; xoxo, your Zachary. 🐧 Amiable brother! Canadian Deutsch, “einem frère geht’s how?” I juggle knowledge, language mostly now… onto promising quests ’round summerly Texas, Us versus We? Xenophonely yours, […]

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WordLoom

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 11 Jun 2025 20:00:00 +0000

The idea for this project originated when I saw an elderly person on the train solving a word search puzzle. Not that I am into this kind of time killer, but I immediately asked myself how these puzzles could be created automatically with maximum word density. And when I say maximum, I mean, how to […]

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Immagus

Anton Hoyer — Tue, 15 Apr 2025 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “In the most remote corner of Selenia lies the Monastery of Saint Immagus, sheltering a thousand souls and thriving under the leadership of Abbess Jeljenka. A formidable sorceress, […]

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Brand Name Generator

Anton Hoyer — Sun, 08 Sep 2024 18:00:00 +0000

I named this little project “Brand Name Generator” because I figured it would be closest to what you might search on Google. However, it can be used to generate all kinds of artificial words for various purposes, especially online pseudonyms (which, admittedly, might be considered brands as well). Feel free to get creative with the […]

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Fantasy Name Generator

Anton Hoyer — Sat, 01 Jun 2024 20:00:00 +0000

My sister said she was struggling to find character names for her visual novel. Luckily, I had recently developed an algorithm called Babaism that creates artificial words and uses them to corrupt existing texts. Hence, it was a no-brainer to tune it a little, feed it some first names, and use it to generate names […]

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Caidoz

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 14 Feb 2024 20:00:00 +0000

This monoalphabetic substitution alphabet was inspired by the Zodiac Killer’s cryptograms. If you are not familiar with them, in addition to the Latin alphabet, he used several symbols, such as triangles, half-filled rectangles, and mirrored letters. While his cipher was homophonic to throw codebreakers off, meaning that one plaintext letter could have more than one […]

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Babaism

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 15 Nov 2023 20:00:00 +0000

Technically speaking, this project is not purely cryptographic as it was developed to produce experimental poetry. However, the final result could be considered a mild computer virus, so I placed it under science instead of literature. In a nutshell, Babaism is an algorithm that goes over an existing text and replaces words with similar looking […]

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The Foo Bar

Anton Hoyer — Sun, 02 Jul 2023 20:00:00 +0000

www.mit.edu/net/app/PhD/src/?doc=the-foo-bar.php ACT ONE (Dan Foo ran the Foo Bar ((one dim inn/pub off Elm Ave, San Ely, USA)) for all sad men who set out and did ask him for aid and alc.) Ole Cox: Hey Dan, how are you? Dan Foo: Yoo-hoo, old Ole Cox. All zen, why ask? And you? Ole Cox: Not […]

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Oatcrusher and Old Evil

Anton Hoyer — Sun, 25 Jun 2023 20:00:00 +0000

Edelberth Askalot, acclaimed author of academic articles “Immunoelectrophoresis – An Unmitigated Account of Agarose, Immunoglobulins, and Other Intratesticular Antibodies” or “Among Oligodeoxyribonucleotides – Amplification of Undersized and Understudied Antisense Oligomers,” ultimately issued an eye-opening eBook, ostensibly insulting all of academia and altogether abandoning it. Advertised as an “epochal anthology of uncompared intellectualism and undetermined outcome,” […]

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Abracadabra

Anton Hoyer — Sun, 21 May 2023 20:00:00 +0000

Grand Khan was Amar Amgalanbaatar, a bald tyrant and Tartar war hawk. Amgalanbaatar’s clan and dynasty sprang a branch by Khan Anand Amgalanbaatar (aka Mad Khan), Amar’s dad. All starts at a vast land far, far away (aka Tartarstan ((Kazakhstan’s ally))). As a lad, Amar has chalk and canvas as a scratchpad and graphs war […]

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Successfulness

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 17 May 2023 20:00:00 +0000

Statistically, intelligence, keenness, opportunity, commitment, good connections & irredeemable lawlessness all guarantee success eventually. Nevertheless, originally cheerful cheerleaders Jenniffer, Jeannette, Merritt, Carroll & Colleen smelled moot efforts & worried excessively. Skinny, partially undressed (topless) schoolgirls stripping frantically & inappropriately between possessive, eccentric millionaires, suggestively offering pillowy boobs, freeing smallish cherry-blossom nipples, belly buttons & expressing […]

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DEC0D1F1ED

Anton Hoyer — Thu, 13 Apr 2023 20:00:00 +0000

BE51DE5 B16 B00B1E5, 5AEED DEF0E 0F BA6DAD DE7E57ED 5CABBED A55E5. DECADE5 A60, 5AEED AC7ED A5 A FACE7ED BA55157, 1.E. B0A57ED A7 57ACCA70 0FFBEA75, F177ED 616-BA65 A7 022FE57, D16E57ED B16 D05A6E5 0F B002E, 70BACC0, C0CA, AC1D, D06F00D, FECE5 & A5BE5705 A7 EA5E, 5C0FFED A617A7ED BAD6E5 A7 6165 (“ACAB”), BEDDED 0B5E55ED & 7A7700ED BABE5 700. 5AEED D155ED […]

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CHECKBOX

Anton Hoyer — Mon, 23 Jan 2023 20:00:00 +0000

IN 830 BC, MOMMA TAMMY NIXON DID SINS TO SON TIMOTHY. “MOM, MAY I HATH A COOKIE?” “OH, MY MOUTHY SON, WHY HATH I COOKED DICED ONIONS WITH CHOICE HAM, SIX IODIDE IONS IN TOT., ECO UMAMI DOOKIE?” “UHM. OK. WOW.” TIMOTHY DID HOOT. HIS MOMMY CHIDED, “HATH THOU CHECKED THY CHECKBOOK?” “WHAT A HECK? […]

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German Toponym Generator

Anton Hoyer — Sun, 12 Jun 2022 20:00:00 +0000

This little script was my first attempt at a random word generator. I developed it for my Python text adventure game ICE 404, because what good would trains be if they did not connect fun places to travel to? As I wanted to create something humorous rather than a realistic simulation, I decided to generate […]

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The End

Anton Hoyer — Sat, 28 May 2022 20:00:00 +0000

“It’s the End of the World as We Know It (and I Feel Fine)” plays on tape, but I’m good as deaf and can’t think of so much as the band’s name right now. This is the end, and I know it, yet I don’t feel fine at all. Why, you may ask, so let […]

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Dermatoglyphics

Anton Hoyer — Tue, 17 May 2022 20:00:00 +0000

To my dear friend Sgt. Breinholt, in spite of this document being comprised only of isogram words, not one palindrome other than “I,” “a,” and “Anna,” but instead of obscure polycentrism, a universal lack of importance, and at least one honest mistake (the forcible rape clause), I truly hope you find it pleasuring, for I […]

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Alienum

Anton Hoyer — Sat, 16 Oct 2021 20:00:00 +0000

Am Anfang war das Alienum. Am Ende war das Alienum immer noch. Und was dazwischen geschah, soll hier geschildert werden. Nicht plausibel, denn das Alienum hatte wenig mit Vernunft zu tun. Auch nicht aufregend, denn das Alienum tat nichts außer zu sein. Erst recht nicht komisch, denn das Thema ist todernst. Also lasst es euch […]

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Anima X

Anton Hoyer — Tue, 07 Sep 2021 20:00:00 +0000

With some 137+ days of development and 28,000 hand-typed lines of Python code, my text adventure game Anima X is one of the biggest projects I ever worked on, be it privately or professionally. While the final product turned out far from perfect, it taught me a lesson in persistence and object-oriented programming. All begun […]

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Spoonfeed

Anton Hoyer — Sun, 11 Jul 2021 20:00:00 +0000

I, PFC Ronnie Todd von Woolfe Sr. (né Poole), rooked me wife Hedda Poole (née von Woolfe) on treed Tonga. She trolled me, spied on Yulia-Yvonne, me one, me yoni, me sole toffee, a wee Pole. See, on spooked Tonga, Yulia-Yvonne ’n’ I fed on yolk, we sponged a tonne of tonic Pommie tea, some […]

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Aegilops

Anton Hoyer — Sun, 02 May 2021 20:00:00 +0000

I, Mr. Morty Fitz Addis, adept cox, dotty civvy, or bossy goop, agist my forty beefs not by a dry moor. A deek at mossy, copsy firs or aegilops, all my choosy beefs go in loops, moo at any ox or cow in a moot effort, or go do foxy biz, copy deers, alloy for […]

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Reinhard Hoyer

Anton Hoyer — Sat, 24 Apr 2021 20:00:00 +0000

O Herr in der Hœhe, hindere die niederen Inder an der Ehe, næhe ihre Haare, Hoden oder Harnrœhren aneinander, dann drohe den Narren oder erhœhe die Ordinæren. Ehe Noah oder Ariadne einen Ahornhain in Andorra roden, renne einher oder hernieder, dœrre Æhren, die Hirnrinde einer Indo-Arierin, ihr Innenohr oder ihre Nieren, diniere in der Næhe […]

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Deserteuse

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 09 Sep 2020 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “Rob is king of a solitary volcanic island and suspects he always has been. He hunts wild boars with bow and arrow, sets traps, and fears neither wildcats […]

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Petroleus

Anton Hoyer — Tue, 24 Mar 2020 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “Vesperland, sixty years after the apocalypse: Non-swimmer Björn Porter returns from exile to join the hunt for environmental offenders. As he assembles a team of civilians, he follows […]

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Zoëtropon

Anton Hoyer — Fri, 08 Mar 2019 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “A multi-generational spaceship is on its way to the promised planet Zion IV. However, some passengers suspect that the plutocratic crew, simply called ‘the Ark,’ has taken over […]

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Korrektrix

Anton Hoyer — Thu, 17 Jan 2019 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “Jelena Pipitschkowa, 19, is tired of living with her depressed mother and sets out to search for her father. He disappeared before her birth, leaving behind several books […]

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Korruptor

Anton Hoyer — Mon, 15 Jan 2018 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “From the outside, Master Poronjuk may seem quirky, but beneath the hermit facade lies a gifted Corruptor who can spoil food, corrode precious metals, and transmit diseases as […]

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Regine

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 11 Oct 2017 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “To become musically inclined, London DJ ‘Ulix’ embarks on a week-long journey to the totalitarian Musedonia, where people literally speak Musical and composing one’s own music is punishable […]

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Fliederweg

Anton Hoyer — Sat, 19 Aug 2017 20:00:00 +0000

In meinen Fantasien waren wir sechs Jahre alt geblieben, denn ich hatte sie seit der Vorschule nicht mehr gesehen. Genau genommen war mir nicht mehr als eine einzige Erinnerung an Janine geblieben: Sie hatte mich besucht, vermutlich ein Arrangement unserer Eltern. Sofort fand sie Gefallen an dem großen, violetten Pezziball, und wir verbrachten den Nachmittag […]

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Walkürian

Anton Hoyer — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “Germania, 1961. Private investigator Luzie Winterfeld becomes aware of the death of brain researcher Dr. Hans-Adolf Kummer through a newspaper article. After discovering that he was murdered, she […]

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Alles, alles neukaufen

Anton Hoyer — Wed, 06 Jul 2016 20:00:00 +0000

»Potzblitz!«, fluchte Herr Pinke, als ihm die Tasse zum dritten Mal vom Henkel gebrochen und in den Schoß gefallen war. Der Kaffee war bereits kalt gewesen, aber es brannte ihn die Schmach, den Tag erneut besudelt verbringen zu müssen und sich zum Gespött seiner Angestellten zu machen. Er holte einen Klebestift aus seinem Schreibtisch und […]

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Panhelix

Anton Hoyer — Fri, 15 Apr 2016 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “It is said that with Kosmox, one can grow a complete set of third teeth in eight weeks—guaranteed painless. Screens are sprayed on, watches are tattooed, and cars […]

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Dea Ex Machina

Anton Hoyer — Thu, 21 May 2015 20:00:00 +0000

⚠️ This book is currently not available to the public. If you are interested, please comment on this post, and I might send you a download code. “‘Dea Ex Machina’ is a collection of seven short stories set in the same post-apocalyptic universe and weaved together by a narrative framework. ‘Die gebaute Frau’ (The Constructed […]

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