Statistically, intelligence, keenness, opportunity, commitment, good connections & irredeemable lawlessness all guarantee success eventually.
Nevertheless, originally cheerful cheerleaders Jenniffer, Jeannette, Merritt, Carroll & Colleen smelled moot efforts & worried excessively. Skinny, partially undressed (topless) schoolgirls stripping frantically & inappropriately between possessive, eccentric millionaires, suggestively offering pillowy boobs, freeing smallish cherry-blossom nipples, belly buttons & expressing daddy issues; married fools dollar bill-littering classroom floors, polluting & environmentally challenging evergreen territories & jizzing incessantly between meetings & coffee intermissions. Piss-poor pussycats, little stressed desserts, perpetually cheek-kissed & asshole-assaulted, financially deeply hooked, willingly massaging sleepless noodles; all pretty, practically harmless, weed-killing millennials (essentially teenagers).
Darkness fell across Garrettsville, soon dizzy lassie roommates Annabell Zimmermann & Charlotte Moore floor-dropped, apparently asleep, unusually pallid, cheesy-yellow dolls, bleeding internally, passing horrifically, terribly snuffed. Initially puzzled, all surrounding goofball millionaires understood: unhappy accidents happen (really illustrates upper-classic aloofness, arrogance & narcissism). Keeping still appealed, soon virtually all seemed forgotten, lassies still missing.
Historically, Tennessee, Mississippi, Massachusetts, Illinois, Pennsylvania, Minnesota, Missouri & upper Connecticut all allowed corruption, drunkenness, battery, miscellaneous offenses & overall creepiness till Congress passed forbidding commandments. Actually, tabooed zoophilia, too: hillbillies sexually hitting deer, sheep, cattle (especially Galloway beef patties), rabbit bunnies, basset doggies, racoons & different crossbred mammals.
Internationally, Caribbean voodoo missionaries ferried across Hawaiian atolls, Seychellean lagoons & sunny Philippines, pioneering & mapping all territories globally, swimming between floods, hurricanes & bottomless abysses, cutting treeless arrowwood & rootless fleetwood, blissfully harnessing bitterroot, belladonna, tobacco, cottonseed, gooseberry, willow offshoots, sweet woodruff, butterflies, grasshoppers, moonbird gallbladder & hallucinogenic mushrooms, symmetrically tattooing tessellated crisscross patterns across bloodless eelskin. Tall Greek odyssey warriors, still merry buffoons (commanding & quarreling goddesses possess appointed tools).
Typically, handicapped buccaneers controlled fishhook attachments manually (programmatically dismissing accessibility), skillfully shooting artillery (stainless steel cannonballs & dumbbell missiles) off buttressed, bulletproof battleships, massively attacking & popping blood vessels, jamming uttered distress calls, occasionally looting biggest booty, collecting communicative parrots & Swiss booze bottles, effortlessly accumulating billion dollar assets.
Officially, difficulties peeing, anxiousness & sleeplessness following planned buccaneer assaults dramatically corrupt blissful feelings, potentially boosting bitterness, hopelessness, aggressiveness & depression. Naturally, uninterrupted horror & terror systematically breed terrorism & horrorism. Suffering immigrants continually gotta witness bullying & oppression, groundless accusations & horrific deeds.
Specifically, three trigger-happy Tallahassee officers Russell O’Connelly, Jarrett Donelly & Darrell Doolittle arrested & sadistically assassinated fifteen transsexual grannies, all homeless, tendentially indifferent & allegedly seething communists. Soon commenced bloody interracial rebellions; attention-seeking gazetteers announced collapsing businesses, imminent doom & finally Prussian occupation (gross spelling error). Nonetheless, offscreen surveillance footages immediately illustrated carefully planned textbook bullshitting & collective rubber ballooning.
Indeed, emotionally & mentally affected offender Elliott McDonnell willfully committed three appalling massacres (Bennettsville gallery, Loogootee townhall & Chattahoochee community college). Suddenly, rookies, freelancers, professionals & William Burroughs submitted million compelling thrillers & essays. Soon booksellers illuminated messy showrooms, recommended rubbish-filled bestsellers, shipped grammatically incorrect bookmarks, embarrassing cartoons, wallpapers & written accessory accordingly, till connoisseurs critically acclaimed all books’ narratives, innovations, expressiveness, outspokenness, succinctness, hidden messages & overall skillfulness (see associate professor Kennett Follett). Admittedly, killer arrangement between grabby offender & greedy accomplices, all intellectually, opportunistically, economically, legally & literally. Quintessentially, terrorist & bookkeepers mutually benefitted substantially. Hellish alliance, utterly foolproof & commercially successful.
Brutally chopped landfill carcasses? Bittersweet collateral! Aggregated interrogation & confession cassettes? All classified! Middle-class commoners’ assessment? Hopelessly trapped between acceptance & indifference! Funny, correct?
Approximately weekly, commissioner William Lee Doggett (politically rotten scattergood) misappropriated allocated wallets, withheld illogical spreadsheets, accidentally slipped telling employees, totally ripped off Finnish ambassador Miss Collette Epäjärjestelmällistyttämättömyydelläänsäkäänköhän, smoothly installing puppet plaintiffs, fellow attorney lookalikes & genetically engineered embassy staff doppelgangers. Actually, Doggett’s stiffness, intellectualism & sheer efficiency suggest Russian roots (gross spelling error).
Additionally, Doggett accomplished immense business success selling addictive cellular immunosuppressive pills, shatterproof mirrors, brilliant earrings, lossless SSD-compression appliances & whirpoolproof shampoo. Beginners illegally sell cigarettes, Guinness beer, green grass (cannabis), bootlegged billboard jazz, wooden & woolen collectibles, deepfreezed seafood, fricassee & eggrolls. Winners successfully traffic affordable teenage hookers. Steep career, peerless cheek, sheer lobbyism.
Unaddressed written letter, colloquially appreciating Doggett’s fell deeds:
“Hello, keen commissioner, greetings! Succeed thee well!
Tell jibber jabber, surreptitiously kill opposition & innocent messengers! Hollywood screenplays approve thee, borrowing silly lessons! Summary: weddings, honeymoons, marriages, hookers, anniversaries, affairs, threesomes, battles, dissociations, all looping annually!
Pessimistic outlook: unless all current communal dilemmas gotta been annulled tomorrow afternoon, communist guerrillas shall attempt accurately assassinating thee & possible successors! Ideally wanna hurry!
Godspeed & goodbye,
three disappointed coppers
(Appendix: Gotta bless free speech personally)”
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This text consists only of words with at least one pair (preferably multiple pairs) of consecutively repeating letters, thus utilizing a vocabulary that is mutually exclusive from the vocabulary used in Dermatoglyphics.
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